The Lark Ascending by George Meredith

HE rises and begins to round,

He drops the silver chain of sound

Of many links without a break,

In chirrup, whistle, slur and shake,

All intervolv’d and spreading wide,
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Like water-dimples down a tide

Where ripple ripple overcurls

And eddy into eddy whirls;

A press of hurried notes that run

So fleet they scarce are more than one,
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Yet changingly the trills repeat

And linger ringing while they fleet,

Sweet to the quick o’ the ear, and dear

To her beyond the handmaid ear,

Who sits beside our inner springs,
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Too often dry for this he brings,

Which seems the very jet of earth

At sight of sun, her musci’s mirth,

As up he wings the spiral stair,

A song of light, and pierces air
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With fountain ardor, fountain play,

To reach the shining tops of day,

And drink in everything discern’d

An ecstasy to music turn’d,

Impell’d by what his happy bill
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Disperses; drinking, showering still,

Unthinking save that he may give

His voice the outlet, there to live

Renew’d in endless notes of glee,

So thirsty of his voice is he,
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For all to hear and all to know

That he is joy, awake, aglow,

The tumult of the heart to hear

Through pureness filter’d crystal-clear,

And know the pleasure sprinkled bright
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By simple singing of delight,

Shrill, irreflective, unrestrain’d,

Rapt, ringing, on the jet sustain’d

Without a break, without a fall,

Sweet-silvery, sheer lyrical,
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Perennial, quavering up the chord

Like myriad dews of sunny sward

That trembling into fulness shine,

And sparkle dropping argentine;

Such wooing as the ear receives
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From zephyr caught in choric leaves

Of aspens when their chattering net

Is flush’d to white with shivers wet;

And such the water-spirit’s chime

On mountain heights in morning’s prime,
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Too freshly sweet to seem excess,

Too animate to need a stress;

But wider over many heads

The starry voice ascending spreads,

Awakening, as it waxes thin,
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The best in us to him akin;

And every face to watch him rais’d,

Puts on the light of children prais’d,

So rich our human pleasure ripes

When sweetness on sincereness pipes,
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Though nought be promis’d from the seas,

But only a soft-ruffling breeze

Sweep glittering on a still content,

Serenity in ravishment.


For singing till his heaven fills,
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’T is love of earth that he instils,

And ever winging up and up,

Our valley is his golden cup,

And he the wine which overflows

To lift us with him as he goes:
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The woods and brooks, the sheep and kine

He is, the hills, the human line,

The meadows green, the fallows brown,

The dreams of labor in the town;

He sings the sap, the quicken’d veins;
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The wedding song of sun and rains

He is, the dance of children, thanks

Of sowers, shout of primrose-banks,

And eye of violets while they breathe;

All these the circling song will wreathe,
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And you shall hear the herb and tree,

The better heart of men shall see,

Shall feel celestially, as long

As you crave nothing save the song.

Was never voice of ours could say
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Our inmost in the sweetest way,

Like yonder voice aloft, and link

All hearers in the song they drink:

Our wisdom speaks from failing blood,

Our passion is too full in flood,
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We want the key of his wild note

Of truthful in a tuneful throat,

The song seraphically free

Of taint of personality,

So pure that it salutes the suns
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The voice of one for millions,

In whom the millions rejoice

For giving their one spirit voice.


Yet men have we, whom we revere,

Now names, and men still housing here,
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Whose lives, by many a battle-dint

Defaced, and grinding wheels on flint,

Yield substance, though they sing not, sweet

For song our highest heaven to greet:

Whom heavenly singing gives us new,
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Enspheres them brilliant in our blue,

From firmest base to farthest leap,

Because their love of Earth is deep,

And they are warriors in accord

With life to serve and pass reward,
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So touching purest and so heard

In the brain’s reflex of yon bird;

Wherefore their soul in me, or mine,

Through self-forgetfulness divine,

In them, that song aloft maintains,
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To fill the sky and thrill the plains

With showerings drawn from human stores,

As he to silence nearer soars,

Extends the world at wings and dome,

More spacious making more our home,
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Till lost on his aërial rings

In light, and then the fancy sings.

Life 4.0

So, I've been so busy you don't understand. First was camp...amazing. So much stuff went down it's hard to remember every detail, but I'll try. A lot of things changed, our schedule got busier, and they tired us out a lot more quickly. I think I probably took like a nap everyday, like an old person. But hey, I understand why they do it now! Anyways, Kevin came back to preach and he was intense. I mean like cry every sermon, passion overflowing from every one of his veins. He hit us fast and hard and it was by far a no holds barred match up between us and God (in a good way).

The band was also amazing. It was their first time leading a camp, but they were amazing. I remember it was like the second day (maybe third) and they were playing through their set like normal. Before camp, I had been really apprehensive of letting God take a hold of me. I was convinced I didn't need help, that I had it going on...boy was I wrong.

You let your guard down at all when the Spirit is moving and BAM...it hits you hard. I can't explain it in a way to do it justice, and unless you are a Christian and have felt the Spirit moving you probably wouldn't understand, but this feeling was scary and happy and sad and exhilarating and tiring and everything you want in a personal experience with the Lord, the Creator of the universe.

As I listened to the band play on and stood in the midst of a hundred other students, all sound drowned out. It was like one of those sleeps when you are both aware and unaware of your surroundings. Even the music seemed dulled in comparison to the Lord's presence. I was performing for an audience of one, and even if everyone else sat down, I would have been standing. It was amazing to just stand in the Lord's presence, in awe of all the things He has done, is doing, and will do.

So, camp wrapped up and we all went our separate ways...that meant that Paul, JP, my dad, and I all headed out on our road trip. Again, so many things happened, but I really wanted to say one thing.

The Lord is good! Those words are really not enough (good Relient K song by the way) to explain how glorious and majestic our Father truly is. We got the chance to watch the sun set over the Grand Canyon, an oh what a sight to see! We sat on the edge as I read Job 38 and Psalm 104, fearing for the lives of my more courageous brothers, completely in awe of the Lord and His creation. I remember thinking "how could such an awesome God love such wretched creatures as us?" He doesn't need us, but He wants us. When we hate Him, He loves us. When we abandon Him, He is steadfast. There are no words to explain the magnitude and beauty of the Grand Canyon, just like there are not enough words to describe our Awesome God.

OK, so after (and even during) this major life experience, I was thinking about someone. This someone is very special to me, but I'm kind of confused about how. Is she special to me like a sister (she is one of my best friends), or is it more than that (I know that I am at least attracted to her)? We have known each other since we were semi-young, but it never really worked out to where we dated. I've liked her at points, and she's liked me at points (I think), but it just never worked out I guess.

So now, randomly I think, I have begun to wonder about my feelings for her. I know I don't want a serious relationship with her or anyone else right now because I need to focus on my nursing school, but I don't know how to go about the situation. I know we fight a lot, and I act like a complete idiot and jerk to her because I hate it when she talks about other guys and how she likes them (she has a right to, I know), and I know that jealousy has no place in a good relationship, but I don't know how to act around her. Recently I've done better, partly because we haven't seen each other, at keeping my mouth shut and letting her talk and just treating her like a friend, which she is. I don't know how to explain it all. I think she is so beautiful, she loves the Lord, she is hilarious, she has so many strong qualities, and she's kind of quirky, but I don't know if it goes past an infatuation into a liking, and if it does, how do I handle it? Girls stink...

[Deep breath] There you go. My life in a nutshell, written in a hasty 30 minutes' longing to go to bed. Whew, now I just have the rest of my life ahead of me...

For You

A picture of perfection is nowhere near perfect,
My reflection of you is so blatantly worthless,
How can I lie and say it doesn't matter...
When everytime I move, I commit murder?

It's over, I'm done, You finally won,
It's over, I'm through, I give it all to you.

My eyes are dry and I have nothing left.
These tears on my cheeks give away my distress.
How many times will it take me to realize...
Without you I'm nothing, take this weight off my chest.

It's over, I'm done, You finally won,
It's over, I'm through, I give it all to you.

My heart and my mind,
Are no longer mine.
This stone heart in my chest,
Is Yours till my last breath.
All struggle and strife,
My sad little life,
Is taken, now taken...

It's over, I'm done, You finally won,
It's over, I'm through, I give it all to you.
My Father, Your son, has finally won,
Now I know what to do...to live for You.

The Last Day, (Original)

I wrote this today in honor of no school. Summer is an easy subject to sing about because of all the emotions and memories tied to it. This is also inspired by Blink-182...

Last day of school is the very best,
Last day of school and some unrest.
We throw our papers in the sky,

Last day of school! Oh my, my, my!

It rained the start of summer, won’t
Go out to play, what a bummer, don’t
Go to the swimming pool just yet.
I can’t afford to get my hair wet.

Take a road trip with my bestest friends,
No one wants the fun to ever end.
Come home and sleep till one o’clock,
I think I might be out of clean socks.

Last day of summer really sucks,
Last day of summer with a hundred bucks.
We throw our last gigantic gig,
Last day of summer and we go out big!

Breathe, 5.19.08 (Original)

This is a much slower one. Very organic sounding. I was inspired by the soundtrack of Juno, if that helps. It is about being overwhelmed by the senses and our surroundings and just stopping to breathe...

The smell of leaves, the smell of smoke,
It gets so thick I might just choke.
The sight of ants, the sight of trees,
So natural I cannot breathe.
A gravel trail, heading back,
To the lake and railroad track.
A silver lamp, above my bed,
The fumes begin to fill my head…

…Breathe, just breathe.
Breathe, just breathe…

The wooden church, the wooden dock,
Let me in I’ll pick the lock.
The metal chair, the metal table,
If I try I might be able.
A steeple shoots, into the sky,
A lonely cloud has caught my eye.
A building looms, above the nest,
I’m getting dizzy need a rest.

…Breathe, just breathe.
Breathe, just breathe…

Moon Pies, 5.17.08 (Original)

Last night, at the party,

You came, a little tardy.

Not drunk, not high,

You had a moon pie.

Moon pies, made of chocolate,

Don't fit, in your pocket.

Moon pies, made of 'mellows,

Don't jiggle like jellow.

Monday, at the mall,

Your friend, was very tall.

He's cool, I know,

'Cuz he likes, snow cones.

Snow cones, made of ice,

Can be, very nice

Snow cones, made of juice,

My dad's name is Bruce...

I wish you could hear it sung. It's really funny! Kind of Blink-182 with a little Relient k. Oh, and by the way, my dad's name is not Bruce...

Falling or Flying, Grace Potter and the Nocturnals

Wake up lost again
Drove to the end of the road
And a red faced man
Taught us to do what were told

And on the 23rd night
Things ain’t bad
But things aint right

Are we falling or flying
Are we falling or flying
Are we living or dying
I guess we’ll never know

Air so heavy
It could drown a butterfly
If it flew too high

And I get the feeling
That the truck driver aint shy
Cuz he looking at me but no where near my eyes

On the 35th morning
Things aint good
But things aint boring

Striking rock or hitting gold

Sometimes its hard to tell If theres a life behind a song
But I know tomorrow
Today won’t feel so long
Alone

Cuz on the 42nd night
The room was dark
But the stage was bright

Cuz my friend this too shall pass
So play every show like its your last